It all starts at school where we all want to be popular. If we are good at maths and physics it could be difficult, instead of being popular we get called names – kids can be unkind – but if good at sport we tread the easy path of being popular with both sexes. I guess these are the two extremes and sometimes we will do anything to appease another just to avoid being bullied.
Unfortunately these feelings are difficult to shake off and often follow us into adult life and even later life when we will doing anything for a quiet life. However when rising through the ranks we quickly realise that to become a good captain or manager you don’t make many friends. It’s the price of success and goes with the territory.
However since we receive the initial ways of living from our parents it is often their attitudes that become our attitudes. But here’s the thing, and I do believe that many of these pearls of wisdom should be taught in schools, that that’s not the way it has to be.
Abraham has brought us this important message:
Other’s Opinions Are Less Important Than My Personal Guidance System … You
did not intend to use the opinions of your parents to measure against your beliefs, desires, or actions in order to determine the appropriateness of them.
Instead, you knew (and still remembered, long after you were born) that it was the relationship between the opinion (or knowledge) of the Source within you and your current thoughts, in any moment, that would offer you perfect guidance in the form of emotions.
You did not intend to replace your Emotional Guidance System with the opinions of your parents even if they were in harmony with their Emotional Guidance System in the moment of their trying to guide you. It was much more important to you to recognize the existence of your own Guidance System, and to utilize it, than to be deemed correct by, or to find approval from, others.
A pity that this important knowledge, if known, gets lost in the miasma of growing up. I was not a butch kid and failed at sports, except gymnastics – which was the start of my path to control mind and body – and not exactly bullied but lets call it tantalised. Constantly poked in the back and hit on the head by the guy behind me in class. One day I’d had enough, and while the master faced the blackboard, I swung by right arm behind me with clenched fist that hit him on the side of the head and nearly knocked him out. I was twelve at the time and no one messed with me after that! You don’t have to please others so long as you please yourself.
Stand up for yourself and be happy, Love David
clear
Angel Messenger 
Hi David … I do understand where you are coming from. Many of us..considered the “Nerds” have been bullied in school in one way or another. The problem, I see, is that growing up we carried these “traumatic” experiences with us . Trying to avoid problems with others we simply step out of their way or try to please them by displeasing ourselves.
We do live in societies because humans are gregarious animals and seldom can live in solitary, and therefore we subject ourselves to many disgraceful rules. We are living (usually) in democracies that do not permit us to express our discontentment, for a minority decides in our names !!! Pleasing others should never be annoying to ourselves for then it is mere hypocrisy and one day or another we are found out anyway.
Pleasing others should stem from a good nature that accepts living in the world but still being true to oneself. What our culture calls good education therefore is the pleasant behaviour of a civil person towards its fellowmen and women, though it should never include not being true to oneself, that is an other matter all together and certainly not advisable.
Do well and don’t look back .. is a Belgian saying which means that, if you are in accordance with your conscience, the opinion of others should not make you sway. Listen to your elders or to those who have something to say, try to understand why and what they say, and then accept to change your ways or continue to be who you are.
To terminate this diatribe ,I would only add that it is NOT looking for the approval of others that counts but to have enough self-control and self-esteem to know when you are right or when you are wrong and to act accordingly.
Yes, let’s stand up for ourselves and be…happy.
Eugene